Conversations In Cars

Car conversations are the most intimate and comfortable, the perfect balance between presence with another and truth to yourself.

Spaces

The best spaces are ones you can randomly go to and have a reasonable expectation of seeing someone you know. Cultivate these spaces. They’re the best blend of spontaneity and community.

Get Curious

When you feel down, get curious. Fancy yourself in a PhD program studying Your Lows.

Observe, accept, and research the times that you feel down.

Get curious instead of getting down on yourself.

Wandering

Walking without purpose or direction makes presence easy. This immersion is part of why we love traveling. But we can experience it every day if we want.

Bright Lines

Bright lines are beautiful because one decision eliminates hundreds of others.

If you’re a vegan, then you don’t have to think about whether to indulge in BBQ ribs or an ice cream sandwich occasionally. You’ve already decided.

Bright lines are hard, and it’s difficult to implement many of them. But find one or two bright lines, and you’ll unlock tremendous mental capacity.

Music

When Chopin and Beethoven lived, there were no recordings. You had to hear what they composed in person, and you likely never heard it again.

What would we think about music if we could only listen to any song once?

Cats

If the space you live in feels claustrophobic, watch a cat exist in the same space: with curious, ever-present eyes, and a deep sense of peace.

Always A Reason

There’s always a reason to not do something. Every day, something tragic happens on earth that can justify us giving up on the day.

We can’t let it stop us. There’s always a reason to keep on keeping on.

Visualization

Setting goals about the future is easier when you visualize what you want your life to be like rather than listing bullet points of a future resume. Viscerally visualize.

Mistakes

I once had a clock that didn’t work for two years because I didn’t buy the AA batteries it needed. I once wore unwashed dress shirts for months because I didn’t go to the dry cleaners.

I knew I should have done something. But the inertia was too strong. I made mistakes, and the clock and shirts were the reminders that I didn’t come through for myself. 

But I’m glad it happened.

My clocks work, and my dress shirts are always pressed. Sometimes it takes big mistakes for lasting change to stick.